How to share despite the fear holding you back

I met a woman at a networking event. She mentioned how she dreamed of selling her art but just couldn't. Suddenly, I was transported back to Sunday, July 5th, 2020 (yes, it's marked on my calendar) when I felt the same way. I wanted to hug her, tell her everything would be all right, and tell her she could follow her dreams starting today. 

If you're holding back on sharing because you're afraid, no one will like it, opening yourself up to criticism or who you are to sell your work, and feeling like a total imposter, you're not alone. Here's my story (well, one of them!). 

On that Sunday four years ago, my daughter and I sat at the table, and she could tell I was frustrated. I was scrolling through all of these other women photographers selling their beach prints that looked like mine, and here I was, mad at them because they were doing something that was triggering me. I was jealous. I wanted to be doing what they were. And I wasn't. And that made me so hurt and sad, and my daughter could tell. 

So when she innocently asked why I wasn't selling my art, I looked at her like what do you know?? You're 7 years old. You have to do all of these things, like build a website and market it. And as the words came out of my mouth, I knew they sounded silly. Can't I figure out how to do that? 

After dropping her off at camp the next day, I sat at that desk and typed into Google "how to set up a print photography website." Two days later, I hit publish and had a site. I shared it on my IG page, and a minute later, a follower bought a print (or at least tried to—there was definitely some troubleshooting that made me sweat). But I was in shock. 

You can go through all the stages, from self-doubt to self-pride, if you just take the steps. Sometimes, a fresh perspective from someone else (HELLO!) shows us that there is a way forward. 

Start with small steps, like mentioning your work is for sale on social or showing it to friends in a safe space. See how that feels and figure out the next step. As each step leads to the next, you gain strength, clarity, and confidence to keep going. Once you start doing things, you realize that you're still alive—that you're making it through, and it's not as hard or as bad as you had made it up!

I finally got sick and tired of not doing anything about it. And when I did, I wished I had started sooner. You just have to get enough courage to take one step. And then the next. And the next. And before you know it, you're doing the thing you were so scared to do! And you're a little more confident, too!

Looking back at myself sitting at that desk, I went from jealous to curious to excited to proud. That's a massive range of emotions to experience, and it's all because I knew in my heart I had to see it through. And if I didn't, you wouldn't be reading this email today. 

I finally said enough is enough and started making changes. And now, I encourage others to take the first step toward their goals. So ask yourself, what is your dream, and what can you do today to take one step toward it?

And if you need a hand, I’m right here. Just shoot me an email back.

Love you. Gotta go. Bye. 

xoox

Tamara