How to prioritize yourself as a mom 👩‍👧‍👦

This week, I'm alone. The kids went to Florida on break, and I stayed to work a HUGE event. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't envious of the sun-soaked beaches, but I'm actually psyched about the opportunity to have some uninterrupted time. I am happy they are away having fun while I'm on Zoom and sending emails. In fact, I love being alone. 

I realized this email could be about how to spend alone time, but I also want to emphasize that you need to take the time and not feel guilty about it. 

It's hard for a mom to say go have fun without me. But you know what? I was so happy to say those words. I won’t cancel on my dreams of doing “the right thing.” And I will not sit on that beach and regret missing out on this opportunity. 

I don’t care what it looks like or how others think about my actions. I have hopes, dreams, and goals, and I’m going after them today. The beach can wait. The kids understand. There will be more trips. I want them to go have fun, and I want me to go have fun. We’re just doing it in our own way right now. And that’s OK.

My daughter sent me this picture from the plane and was so happy to share the sunrise with me. And that’s it right there. She’s happy doing her thing, and I’m happy doing mine. There’s no loss of love. There’s only room for growth. She knows I have a job to do, and she’s coming back in a few days, and we’ll talk about our unique adventures. 

In these past two days of solitude, I've come to realize a few things:

1. Embrace Routine: I find comfort in sticking to my usual pattern, from not watching TV, heading to bed early, and going for my sunrise run. It's a reminder that even in solitude, some things remain constant. 

2. Do What You Want: I've been listening to podcasts aloud, something I never do when the family is around. It's a small joy that I'm indulging in because I want to, and that's what matters.

3. Prioritize Learning: With the house to myself, I've been taking courses on building my business and soaking up knowledge that can only be absorbed in quiet moments.

4. Drop The To Do List: While the idea of cleaning the house could come to mind. I've consciously decided to prioritize self-improvement over household chores. These precious hours are too valuable to be spent on anything less than transformative. (I could go on about this point because I hear so many moms say, " Oh, the kids left, and I scrubbed down the house for hours, and I’m like 😳 why would you spend your precious quiet time cleaning?) 

I basically have the same routine when my family is around and when I'm alone, and that's a good thing. We shouldn't live a life that's not true to our identity. We may also be conditioned or set in our ways of doing things. It could also be outside forces that keep things the same. However, I should listen to my podcasts out loud if I want to, even when they are home.

Here's how you can make the most of your alone time to take steps toward building your confidence:

• Set Goals: Take this opportunity to set specific goals for yourself, whether mastering a new skill or tackling a personal project. If you need help figuring out what goals to have, check out MasterClass, visit the library, or invest in an online course. When you explore your interests, you'll hone in on what direction you want to go in. 

• Invest in Self-Care: Use this time to pamper yourself and indulge in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, whether reading a book or taking a bath without someone walking in on you. I scheduled a massage for the morning after my big event, so I have something to look forward to and to reward myself. 

• Explore Your Passions: Reconnect with activities or hobbies you may have set aside due to a busy schedule. Use this time to reignite your passions and explore new interests. I'm dying to try pickleball again, hang out with my girlfriends, go through my closet, and weed out stuff that no longer makes me feel confident (speaking of which, I have new Today with Tamara merch coming!!! Stay tuned!!).

So go live your life, mama. The kids need you to. You need to. And they are watching. So, if you pass on your dreams to sit with them, what does that say? Get up and go. Trust the timing is always right. You’re exactly where you need to be, taking the steps towards building your confidence. Let’s go together. 

Now, here’s when we say:

xoxo

Tamara